I showed him my bush... on skype.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
