since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
