Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
birth control should be required to get into college
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
