READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
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