party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
