so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
