I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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