I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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