I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
