I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
