That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Dear sober self: your car keys are in the glove compartment, your car is outside the church. I hope you're reading this from your own bed instead of someone else's.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
