Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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