..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
Randomize
