party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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