I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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