No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
we should paint friendship bongs
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
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