Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
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