Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize
