we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
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