I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Damn victory sex feels great
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
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