Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize