He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
