Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Randomize
