So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
I think a kid would responsible me up
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
