Dual....:-)
I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
Randomize