I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
