Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Randomize
