i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Enjoy the penises
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
