I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
wow bdsm is so cute
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
