She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Randomize
