I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
