He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Randomize
