I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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