Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
