wake up i wanna do it froggy style
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Randomize
