dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
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