Heybabeimwearingurpanties
birth control should be required to get into college
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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