it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
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