i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
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