Can Purell be used as lube?
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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