he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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