Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize
