Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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