About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
it's like heaven, but drunker
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
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