lets start a swedish sibling band together
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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