does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
