Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
