ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
Randomize
