based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
