Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize
